Some people are born funny, others have to work hard to make themselves seem funny to others. Unlike popular perception, I belong to the second category. I have developed this ability after exhaustive observation of people's reactions to various forms of humor.
It may seem to you that I am making unnecessary brouhaha over as light a topic as humor, but the truth is, while it is no rocket science, it is dangerous enough to cause wars. Humor is always at the expense of someone. If not thought through, it may as well be termed bullying. It should thus always be treated with extreme caution. Things can get very ugly, people though they may not express it, do get hurt deep down, so your safest target is your self.
The various nuances of Humor.
Let us see, if I can make you into a harmless funny person in a few simple lessons.
A friend recently asked me to tell a joke. I was at a loss. People should understand that I am just a situational humorist, not a stand-up comedian. The requirements of both are vastly different. While a situational humorist looks for humor in real-time day-to-day life, a comedian has more to deal with the presentation aspect as well as the occasion and decide on the type, length, and flow of the joke. So, the first lesson is, know what you are aiming for. You either memorize excellent jokes and present them or find little funny things in your daily life. Personally, I suck as a comedian.
If you want to be funny or humorous, you first need to be insightful; you need to anticipate what kind of humor works for a particular person, what works universally, and when you start getting good at it, people eventually start finding, rather looking for jokes in whatever you say or do.
Self deprecating humor: Self-criticism is the best and safest bet at humor. However, open-minded your audience may be, nothing serves their egos better than the feeling of apparent domination over anyone (in this case the humorist).
Another thing to be kept in mind with self criticism is that it should almost always be accompanied by a tongue-in-cheek reference to your apparent pride and happiness in said humor. This keeps your humor balanced and avoids reinforcement of your image as an evergreen crybaby.
This logic also holds while making fun at the expense of someone else. He/she should feel a smallest amount of pride from the humor and thus you avoid an extra person carrying a grudge against you.
For example, when I inadvertently tell you how a 7 year old trumped me in a verbal fight, or beat me up, I am not only making fun of myself having lost to a relative toddler, thus fueling your ego (in terms of strength, tact or assertiveness, really depends on the subject), but also, exhibiting maturity and patience, endearing personality traits that are universally appreciated.
Repetition is a very important aspect in humor. It creates a stereotype for the humorist that connects him to the audience by its recall factor. But one should be very careful while using a stereotype. When done rarely, it loses its recall value through which the subject connects with you, and if you fall back on it excessively, it will affect the innovation factor in your humor which will again adversely affect your popularity.
Brand of humor: I personally avoid adult references in my humor, but it really depends on the age group you mostly interact with. It also has to do with the personality that you exhibit. But my view is that, a few subtle references apart, one's "Humor Quotient" should be strong enough that you don't feel the need to fall back on the A-rated.
In a nutshell, I am very good at making very simple things into complex demons with large technical words and seemingly logical intricacies.
No, you picked the wrong nutshell !!!
What I mean to say is that if you are a standard wimp like I used to be, you will be better off as a methodical humorist. Though it is not difficult to be funny otherwise, what I have just illustrated is a safe and proven way. It really is a balancing act and an art. Finally, it is up to you if to you if you end up being rude or downright boring. Until then, enjoy your laughs !!!
It may seem to you that I am making unnecessary brouhaha over as light a topic as humor, but the truth is, while it is no rocket science, it is dangerous enough to cause wars. Humor is always at the expense of someone. If not thought through, it may as well be termed bullying. It should thus always be treated with extreme caution. Things can get very ugly, people though they may not express it, do get hurt deep down, so your safest target is your self.
The various nuances of Humor.
Let us see, if I can make you into a harmless funny person in a few simple lessons.
A friend recently asked me to tell a joke. I was at a loss. People should understand that I am just a situational humorist, not a stand-up comedian. The requirements of both are vastly different. While a situational humorist looks for humor in real-time day-to-day life, a comedian has more to deal with the presentation aspect as well as the occasion and decide on the type, length, and flow of the joke. So, the first lesson is, know what you are aiming for. You either memorize excellent jokes and present them or find little funny things in your daily life. Personally, I suck as a comedian.
If you want to be funny or humorous, you first need to be insightful; you need to anticipate what kind of humor works for a particular person, what works universally, and when you start getting good at it, people eventually start finding, rather looking for jokes in whatever you say or do.
Self deprecating humor: Self-criticism is the best and safest bet at humor. However, open-minded your audience may be, nothing serves their egos better than the feeling of apparent domination over anyone (in this case the humorist).
Another thing to be kept in mind with self criticism is that it should almost always be accompanied by a tongue-in-cheek reference to your apparent pride and happiness in said humor. This keeps your humor balanced and avoids reinforcement of your image as an evergreen crybaby.
This logic also holds while making fun at the expense of someone else. He/she should feel a smallest amount of pride from the humor and thus you avoid an extra person carrying a grudge against you.
For example, when I inadvertently tell you how a 7 year old trumped me in a verbal fight, or beat me up, I am not only making fun of myself having lost to a relative toddler, thus fueling your ego (in terms of strength, tact or assertiveness, really depends on the subject), but also, exhibiting maturity and patience, endearing personality traits that are universally appreciated.
Repetition is a very important aspect in humor. It creates a stereotype for the humorist that connects him to the audience by its recall factor. But one should be very careful while using a stereotype. When done rarely, it loses its recall value through which the subject connects with you, and if you fall back on it excessively, it will affect the innovation factor in your humor which will again adversely affect your popularity.
Brand of humor: I personally avoid adult references in my humor, but it really depends on the age group you mostly interact with. It also has to do with the personality that you exhibit. But my view is that, a few subtle references apart, one's "Humor Quotient" should be strong enough that you don't feel the need to fall back on the A-rated.
In a nutshell, I am very good at making very simple things into complex demons with large technical words and seemingly logical intricacies.
No, you picked the wrong nutshell !!!
What I mean to say is that if you are a standard wimp like I used to be, you will be better off as a methodical humorist. Though it is not difficult to be funny otherwise, what I have just illustrated is a safe and proven way. It really is a balancing act and an art. Finally, it is up to you if to you if you end up being rude or downright boring. Until then, enjoy your laughs !!!
Its not that the jokes are not funny.....its just that most people dont understand them......this happens a lot in my case...nevertheless....... a one liner from groucho marx(one of my favorite comedians)
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