Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Swiss account anyone???

The recent hoopla over recovery of black money stashed in swiss accounts, resulted in rather sinister musings in the megalomaniac brain of yours truly. What if I were to open an account at some Swiss bank when I start working??? Just the thought makes me daydream. A large chunk of my hard-earned money, that would have any way gone into the security of a "delicate kitten of a man"'s journey around the country just because he is "connected" to the country's self anointed first family, will be at my disposal !!! That's Rs. 40000, just for the second year that I will work as a trainee !!!

And why should I not do it? All the illiterate morons that pass off as the who's who of our parliament get to have them. And they steal billions of tax-payer's money in their accounts and most of them are now over 70 years ! I will still be an Engineering graduate fresh out of one of the topmost institutions in the country. If anyone is eligible to hold a swiss account, thats me !!!

I have done the math, it takes an average of about 20-25 years for the government agencies to find out, exactly who got away with stashing their ill-gotten money in swiss banks. Now, since mine will be hard-earned money, so logically speaking, the government must not care about whatever small change I end up hoodwinking from the Income Tax authorities.

So, I can assume to live at least 30 years of extravagant life away from the draconian tax laws; Thirty five if I am smart, and start living in a hostile country that doesn't have an extradition treaty, or if I manage to bribe a few important people. I would have lived away the better part of my life with a large amount of money at my disposal.

After I turn 65 or 70, even if the authorities catch up with me, it won't really matter. In fact, at that age, it would be better to languish in a comfy jail at tax payer's expense (I am counting on the government to retain its wasteful credentials, and instead of upgrading critical infrastructure, will end up making jails more hospitable under pressure from human rights groups). I might also get some Bollywood film-maker to document my life !

Man, this life holds so much promise !

After that much of wishful thinking, I come back to Earth...with a thud. There is no way that the Swiss bank authorities are going to open and maintain an account with that paltry an amount. Being an honest criminal won't do, like the Cadbury Bournville, you have to "earn" the right to get such a privilege. Also, it is a known fact that like the human eye, the "visual range" of the IT officials makes them blind only to those monies exceeding at least a billion dollars...

Argh...the misfortune of being a common man ...:(

Random Musing:
What if, taking cue from the politicians of our country, all the Indians started stashing away their hard-earned money in the swiss banks !!!

1 comment:

Demonizing Trump may turn him into a Messiah

I remember the time around 2015 when Trump's name first came up. Until then, many of us in the rest of the world could barely register h...