Author's note: I wrote this piece 6-7 years ago when I was still at school. Found it today out of sheer coincidence...Now, I plan to make a series out of it :D...So, here goes...
To
Mr. Sodium Natrium,
s-block,
I Group,
III Period,
Modern Periodic Table.
Date: 22 Sept. 2005
Dear Sir,
It has come to our notice that on 21 September, 2005, under normal conditions, 1 bar pressure, and a recorded temperature of 300.6K, you unprovokedly and illegally attacked Mr. Dihydrogen Oxide (Director of the international confederation of important chemical compounds), also injuring several hundreds of atoms of Mr. Nitrogen, Mr. Oxygen and Mr. Argon in the process.
You are, hereby punished under sections 369, 321(II) of Modern Periodic Law and suspended pending enquiry from the International union of reactive metals. You will be kept under the custody of Mr. Kerosene until your hearing for safety reasons. We seek your full cooperation. A copy of the charges against you has been attached.
Have a nice day.
Xenon Xe,
Elemental law enforcement,
Zero group, VI period,
Modern Periodic Table.
ATTACHED:
The charges leveled against you are:
- A deliberate suicide attack on Mr. Dihydrogen Oxide.
- Injuring 1260 molecules (2164 atoms) of Mr. Nitrogen, Mr. Oxygen, and Mr. Argon.
- Severely disturbing the entropy of the system.
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